Saturday, January 30, 2016

The Longing Before the Green

In the old teachings, this time of year, near the beginning of February was when the first green appeared.  It is almost beginning out there.  The earth's energy is still deep down.  But now there is a slight stirring, a quickening of earth energy that will soon begin to move out and up.

There is impatience present all around me.  I can feel it.  I feel a strong desire to be in the springtime energies, to be in my garden, to see the plants, to see the nettle growing, the leaves emerging, feel the warmth of the sun on my face.  And yet, it just isn't time. Is the earth impatient as well? Does she wish for the seeds to be already sprouted?  Does she long for the fragrant rose leaves, the prickly nettle, the magnificent maple to be adorned in her splendor?  

Perhaps the panic, the race of the heart, the irritability, the longing for something better is what comes before the green.  

All ways of feeling are beautiful in their own way.  Feeling sad and hopeless can lead us to a deeper understanding of what we desire.  Being anxious can lead us to create what we desire.  Being angry and impatient can lead us to set clear boundaries for the life we wish to live.  

Being calm and composed is over rated.  Sometimes the wild woman beast in us needs to be unleashed.  Where can you express that?  Who would you be if you knew that what you are feeling is calling you into a deeper experience of life?  

Think of the dandelion that pushes itself up through the concrete to meet the light of the sun.  The strength that we contain within us can literally move mountains.  

May we be strong and also vulnerable.  

May we feel deeply.

May the wild woman be set free.  

May it be in Beauty.  


2 comments:

Courtney Cooke said...

Oh wow Julie, this is exactly what I needed to hear. I couldn't put my finger on the feeling until now, but yes, impatience for the growth process is just the idea that my soul is trying to express. It's lovely to connect that with what the earth around me is going through and to feel support and solidarity in that shared sensation. Beautifully said and strongly shared, thank you so much.

Yana Klimova said...

Dear Julie,

thank you for sharing your wise, eloquent, and always on-point ruminations. Your courage to be the wild woman that you are inspires us to allow that fire inside us to burn brighter. Feelings of impatience and anxiety are indeed common at this time of the year. It helps me to imagine myself as a seed that is still deep below the frozen ground and that seed still needs to get stronger before it pushes up through the concrete, as the Dandelion you describe. A Dandelion shines so brightly because of its strong roots, so I try to learn from its natural wisdom and take this quiet winter time to cultivate my roots. Your lovely email reminders are always so very welcome. May we all take time to rest and nourish ourselves before the gentle spring stirs us into growth.

love to you,
yana